Snow Days

This is a reprint of a blog I did a few years ago--quite apropro for today in the MidSouth. Enjoy.


I love snow-days--—a fact which seems paradoxical knowing how rigid and controlling I am. Yet, when Ron Childers breaks into the regular scheduled programming with a weather announcement predicting ice or snow, my heart goes pitter-patter.
Snow days are a phenomenon peculiar to the south. Surprisingly, above the Mason Dixon line, where we had many snowy days, we had very few snow-days. Even during the blizzard of ‘79 which dumped several feet of snow on the Midwest, life went on as usual. But in the mid-south, just the threat of icy precipitation creates bedlam. Highway crews are put on alert; grocery stores are emptied of bread, milk, and marshmallows; and children are glued to the TV hopefully waiting for news of school closings. Former Boy Scouts crowd the aisles of Home Depot in search of batteries and generators. Lines form outside Blockbuster. An approaching snow fall engenders more excitement than the arrival of Santa Claus.
When we moved to Memphis, we brought with us the Yankee attitude toward snow and ice. Our cars were filled with antifreeze; our sleds and snow shovels were within easy reach; and everyone in the family was outfitted with snow gear and boots. We didn’t know that southerners prepared in a different way.
On a December day, before a flake had fluttered to the ground, my sixth-grader called from school.
“Mom, can you come and get me?” she said.
“Are you sick?” I asked.
“No, but everyone is gone.”
“Gone where?” (I’m thinking rapture.)
“Gone home. Their moms picked them up because of the snow.”
Before long I was properly indoctrinated in Southern ways. I knew that y’all was part of the southern dialect but I was unprepared for its versatility. When I picked my five-year old up at school I heard her presumably well-educated teacher say, “Is this y’all’s coat?” Wow! I didn’t know the word had a possessive form. Now I know that y’all can be singular, plural, nominative, subjective, possessive, and superlative—as in “all y’yall.” I learned to eat grits, cornbread, and slaw on barbecue. And I assimilated a new attitude about weather forecasts.
After the first actual snowfall, I understood the southerners’ over-reaction to snow. They lacked the benefit of training and experience. No one could get out of their drives after a snowfall, because no one shoveled snow. While our neighbors sat in their warm houses enjoying the Currier and Ives scene, my husband cleared our driveway. The next morning when the packed snow had turned to ice, he drove happily off to work while the neighbors were trapped inside—victims of inadequate weather education.
Of course, we didn’t know that getting out of the driveway was the easy part. Driving was treacherous because road crews weren’t prepared to clear side roads. The conditions were exacerbated by the ineptitude of the drivers who had never learned to navigate snow-packed roads. Those, like us, who ventured out in direct violation of the warnings, took their lives in their hands.
Unaware of the danger, I dared to jump in my car, toddler in the back (car-seat non-existent), and headed out into the melee. As I crept through the intersection at Poplar and Germantown road, I opened my window to get a better view. Mistake. Just as I turned the corner, a city worker threw a shovel full of cinders into my open window interrupting my rousing rendition of “Silver Bells.” I was spitting and sputtering, momentarily blinded, and left picking cinders out of cranial orifices for weeks.
The excitement of the kids was contagious and I celebrated with them when the announcement of school closings included Shelby County. They went to bed with their pajamas inside out—a superstition guaranteed to work, in case their prayers weren’t enough to counteract their dad’s. For some reason, he never got into the snow-day spirit-- much to our consternation. Maybe he was jealous since he was the only one who couldn’t turn off the alarm and crawl back into the warm bed. Wall Street didn’t shut down because of a little snow in cotton country. Jim took the closings as a personal affront, an indication that America was moving toward annihilation as the citizens became slackers and sissies.
We were among the few families that owned a sled and a toboggan. The neighborhood kids sought out the nearest hill (or slight rise in the ground) and tramped up and down repeatedly until they were sliding on dirt. After a few hours they came in smelling of wet wool mufflers and mittens. I stood ready to fortify them with hot chocolate and warm cookies before they headed out again to take advantage of the short-lived winter playground.
The children are long-gone now but I still thrill to the list of closings and cancellations on the bottom of the TV. I’m not sure why. Maybe it’s because a snow-day brings the kind of imposed cessation of obligation that otherwise comes only with hospitalization—my own. Everything comes to a halt—a cease-fire in the harried battle of life where the commander-in-chief has given us a twenty-four hour reprieve. Shall we watch an old movie, read a good book or my favorite, bake some gooey verboten comfort food?
Pull out the stops. On a snow-day anything goes.

More Nutraceuticals for Cancer

In my search for a good supplement for cancer patients I revisited some of the sources I found early in our cancer journey. One of these was a product by BioImmune Inc called Enhanced Immune Response. Dr. Robert Moore, a naturopathic physician from Indiana first suggested the product for Jim in 2003. The powder which is taken dissolved in juice contained every vitamin, mineral and herb touted for immune system support that I had come across in my research. And it contained adequate amounts. The driving force behind the company was Arnold Takemoto a researcher devoted to the production of nutraceuticals in cancer treatment. BioImmune was not a multi-level marketing or pyramid level business. The products were only available through medical professionals. Everything checked out and I was convinced that the products were of high quality.

Jim took the supplement for two years along with a buffered Vit C powder also manufactured by the company. Was it effective? Well, Jim remained healthy during the year of aggressive radiation and chemotherapy and he had no evidence of recurring disease during that time. Would that have happened without the supplement? Maybe. Maybe not.

Fast forward to 2010. As I was researching, another nutraceutical company, GNLD, for f.a.i.t.H., it occurred to me that I should probably speak again with Dr. Moore and offer the group information about the supplement Jim had taken. Dr. Moore was, as he has always been, very helpful. He suggested that I contact Arthur Takemoto directly to tell him about Jim’s recovery and about the f.a.i.t.H. group.

I called on a Friday. On Saturday, Dr. Takemoto’s wife Colleen called me back and talked with me for more than an hour about their philosophy, their company, and their “mission”—to help people in their cancer battles. I was pleasantly surprised to hear her say that they are Christians, eager to share Arthur’s gifts with the world.

I’m thinking: Wow! God must have sent me here—all part of his plan to help us find a team of Christians to cure everyone in our group. She told me all about the science behind their newest products (nanotechnology) which, when combined with Immune Enhanced Response make an aggressive alternative program which has been successful in treating late stage cancers. I mentioned to her incidentally that I was somewhat concerned by Jim’s recent physical which showed an elevated blood calcium level.

On Monday, out of the blue, I got a call from Dr. Takemoto himself. No niceties. No small talk. Right to the dagger-like point.

“If your husband’s calcium blood level is elevated, I am 95% certain that the cancer has returned to the bone.”

“Couldn’t it be the result of prior treatment or an indication of a heart irregularity?” I asked, hoping he was wrong.

“Did you not hear what I just said?” he replied in a patronizing tone.

He then went on ad nauseum about his many accomplishments and accolades while I struggled to digest the long distance diagnosis he had just delivered.

Basically he was saying that the only hope was for Jim to start immediately on his program including intravenous vitamin C which could not be administered in TN. The program would cost 4,500 dollars a month (not covered by insurance). When I expressed shock at the cost, he allowed that if there were some others in my group who used his products he could give me a finder’s fee-- greatly reducing our outlay.

Finally, I said, “Look. I hate to be rude but I am really upset and I need to get off the phone to call my oncologist to set up a pet scan. What you’re saying may be true but I need to see exactly what his blood calcium level is and get further tests set up.

I’m sure those of you who have never been in the passenger seat on a cancer journey are wondering why the red lights weren’t flashing in my brain. How a medically savvy adult could, with no reservation, buy into this doomsday diagnosis from a man whom she had never met, can only be understood by those who live under cancer’s shadow.

When I finally was able to extricate myself from his clutches (only after he told me to get my affairs in order), I called the internist’s office leaving an urgent message to get back to me with the results of Jim’s blood work. She returned my call an hour later giving me enough time to call everyone in the family raving like a lunatic that Jim’s cancer was back and I was packing my bags for Houston. No, I’m not exaggerating. I wish I were.

When the nurse did call back she reported that Jim had misunderstood. It is his cardiac calcium score that is elevated NOT his blood calcium level. He goes for a Thallium stress test tomorrow morning. Calcium build up in the arteries is not good but probably not fatal. Preferable, at least in my somewhat twisted mind, to cancer.

I sent Dr. Takemoto an e-mail explaining that we had the wrong information and wouldn’t need his full treatment at this time. Not wanting to throw the baby out with the bathwater, I was very polite, and requested more information for a man I know who wants to use only alternative treatment.

I have not heard another word from the good doctor. Jim and I will not be using the BioImmune products.

Another magic bullet disintegrates.

Nutritional Supplements for Cancer

For the past few months, the topic of conversation at the f.a.i.t.H. meetings has been nutrition, supplements, and complementary treatments. Although everyone in the group is receiving or has received traditional therapies for cancer, all of us are interested in any natural or complementary methods to boost the immune system to enable the body to fight cancer cells and recover from the harsh drugs we have taken.

Jim and I as group facilitators so not endorse any specific type of treatment—traditional, complementary or alternative, but we encourage a free and open exchange of information among the members. I remind you that these are nothing more than opinions—even when they are supported by research and personal experience.

Over the last eight years I have researched a variety of touted “cures” for cancer and concluded that there are no miracle cures. I decided early on that changing the host (the human body) might prevent the cancer from growing again—by changing the environment to make it less supportive of the proliferation of cancer cells. If this were a panacea, people who have been practicing these healthy habits for most of their lives would not get cancer. But they do.

Let’s talk about GNLD which was recommended by one of our members who has seen improvemnent in her husband while taking the supplements. The Golden Neo-life Diamite Company has been around since 1958. They have operated as network marketing company for 52 years. I am somewhat leery of pyramid marketing businesses although I admit this might be a personal bias. I am all for capitalism and don’t object to entrepreneurs making money commensurate with the effort they put forth, but I always wonder whether they are promoting the product for personal gain or because of its benefits to the consumer. Network marketing companies must inflate the price of their products so that the sellers on each level make a profit. Generally companies that function in this way will branch out from their original niche to get into more profitable areas, e.g., cleaning supplies, weight loss products, etc.

That being said, GNLD has not had complaints filed against them and they have an excellent BBB rating.They also have a Scientific Advisory Board with eminent experts in health and medicine. One of the most renowned members was Arthur Furst, a cancer researcher sometimes called the founder of modern chemotherapy. He joined the board in 1978 because he believed that “proper nutrition can protect people from cancer.”

The company has several lines of products divided into nutritionals, herbals, weight loss, skin and personal care, and home care. The Pro Vitality line is has 3 main supplements: Tre-en-en-- developed in 1958 (“provides whole grain lipids & steroids, optimizes cell membrane function”); Carotinoid Complex (whole food supplement providing carotenoids from fruits and vegetables); Omega-III Salmon Oil Plus- ultra hi-potency fish oil.

These seem to be hi quality supplements providing what they claim to provide in terms of ingredients but maybe not benefits. They are expensive though granted less expensive than buying the organic foods that supply the nutrients they include. And surely they are easier to consume and require no preparation. They also provide nutrition to a patient who might not have the appetite to consume the foods.
If you want supplements beyond those naturally found in foods, you must jump into their one of their other lines—herbal or nutritional. In other words the Pro Vitality line provides nutrition but is lacking in other natural compounds recommended for fighting cancer.

I will be covering another nutraceutical company, BioImmune, when I conclude my research. My advice, in the meantime, is to prayerfully consider any treatment plan and be wary of anyone who promises a magic bullet. Exercise, increase your intake of fruits and vegetables, avoid processed foods, and lift each other up in prayer to the Great Physician.

Why Suffering?

“Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary but what is unseen is eternal.” 2 Corinthians 4: 16-18

The diagnosis of a terminal or life threatening disease—like cancer—causes one to seek answers to life’s important questions. In order to accept the possibility of Jim’s death, I needed to believe there was a purpose to our suffering. My ensuing spiritual quest is chronicled in Cancer Journey: A Caregiver’s View from the Passenger Seat. When we spoke this week in Alabama and Georgia, I was reminded how hungry the listeners were for this message of hope and healing. I came home with renewed enthusiasm for sharing our story with the battle-weary warriors on this life journey.

No one is spared suffering in a cancer battle; often it is not until we suffer that the questions arise. From the depths of our despair come the questions: Is God good? Is God omnipotent? Can a good God allow suffering? Either He is good but not all powerful; or He is all powerful, but not good. Can He be both? If He loves us why doesn’t He fix us? As Philip Yancey writes, “Where is God when it hurts?” The answers we come up with will draw us closer to God or drive us further from Him.

On this earth everyone suffers. Suffering is part of the human condition, whether it is in the form of physical pain or mental anguish. Is the suffering senseless?

I like the Roman Catholic idea of “redemptive suffering” first introduced to me by a friend, Cheryl Himmelright. Suffering brings us closer to our Lord Jesus Christ if we view it as an opportunity to share in his suffering for us on the cross.

In “The Redemptive Suffering of St. John,” Father Michael Buckley explains it like this:

“-The God of the Universe is totally Good, Wise, Merciful, Just. His being excludes any shadow of evil.
- Sorrow, suffering and pain did not form part of the original divine plan for mankind. The Old Testament presupposed and described an idyllic era when all was harmonious and peaceful.
- The root cause of evil in the world is: Satan, and mankind, in so far as it comes under the influence of the "Adversary."
- Though God is not the cause of evil and suffering, He can use it, so to speak, as a means of correction and redemption. This, like the other propositions, has to be very carefully understood and interpreted.”

Before you can accept God’s grace and take comfort in His promises, you must decide whether He is trustworthy. To do this, immerse yourself in His Word. See what the Bible has to say about suffering beginning with the Old Testament accounts of Job, Isaiah, and Jeremiah. Call to mind God’s faithfulness in dealing with you through other difficult times. He demonstrates His faithfulness in the small things so that we can trust Him in the bigger ones.

Hopefully you will, as I did, conclude that God is good, that He is a merciful God of Sorrows who sees our suffering but knows that it is fleeting, that He would not leave us in our misery without the hope of being reunited with our loved ones for eternity. Believing these things doesn’t make suffering easier to understand but it does make it easier to bear.

From Father John Lombardi, another Catholic scholar:

“Redemptive suffering is any trial or tribulation (physical or mental) we offer up and UNITE to Jesus- as a "gift" to Him to express our love thru a costly way, in exchange for some other good. Notice the key elements: we consciously choose embrace suffering; it is precious (a "gift") because it is painful (not fun or "easy"); it brings us close(r) to Jesus in an intimate and intense way; and the suffering may "spiritually repair" my own soul or others-and thereby help in the work of redemption (Christ's allowing me to help Him save souls).”

“There are two kinds of suffering-redemptive suffering and wasted suffering…Which one will you chose?”

Lung Cancer Facts

To kick off National Lung Cancer Awareness Month I am listing facts about the disease that changed our lives. Share this with everyone you know to boost awareness, encourage contributions, and save lives.

1. Lung cancer is the # 1 cancer killer.
2. Lung cancer is the #1 cancer killer among women having surpassed breast cancer in 1987.
3. Lung cancer kills more people than colon, prostate, and breast cancers combined.
4. Yet, lung cancer research is least funded of all of the major cancers.
5. Lung cancer kills twice as many women as breast cancer but receives 1/10 the amount of funding.
6. 6 of 10 diagnosed with lung cancer will die within the first year.
7. 7.5 of 10 will die within two years.
8. 20% of those diagosed have never smoked.
9. 60% are former smokers many of whom stopped more than twenty years before.
10. Only 20% are currrent smokers.
11. One reason for the lack of support for LC is the lingering stigma of the disease. No one deserves lung cancer. Share this information with everyone you know.

Why a Support Group?

My introduction to support groups came years ago when co-dependency was the buzz word among lay people and psychologists. I had reached the point where I couldn’t answer the simple question, “How are you today?” without first consulting with my three children. If all was well with them, all was well with me. I was never happier than my least happy child. Seldom were all three problem free, which meant I was seldom happy. Having decided that I fit the criteria for codependency (don’t all mothers?), I finally sought help.

The psychologist thought I would benefit from joining a group of other “co-dependents.” Being a rather private person and new to psychotherapy, I wasn’t eager to share my neuroses with a group of strangers, but since it was more economical than private sessions, I agreed. I was not comfortable at the meetings. I feared judgment; I didn’t really want them to know that I was a sick puppy. I became even more reticent when I realized that compared to the others, my problems were trivial. If I was a sick puppy, they were dying dogs. After sticking it out for several months, I left the group. The only therapeutic value came in the realization that I wasn’t as bad off as I thought.

Despite that negative experience, I am a zealous believer in support groups for cancer patients and caregivers. When Jim was diagnosed, I was desperate to find a group of people who understood what we were going through. I needed to know that survival was possible. I needed someone to help me sort through the maze of a cancer diagnosis. When we couldn’t find a group that met our needs, we started our own—f.a.i.t.H.--facing an illness through Him.

The members of f.a.i.t.H. are bound together by shared experience and a mutual foe—a killer disease. In this group, we do more than regurgitate our pent up hostilities and personality disorders with the sole purpose of catharsis. We do express our emotions without fear of judgment, but something magical happens when our burdens are shared with those who truly care about us and want to help. We are a proactive group intent on helping each other. In my first support group, the members were focused on their personal problems. In this group, the members focus on each other’s problems. We en-courage each other with the same encouragement we have received from God.

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God” ( 2 Corinthians 1: 3-5).

If you are reluctant to join a support group, I ask you to consider some of the benefits:

1. The exchange of information.

A. How to control side-effects

B. Dietary concerns & recipes

C. Available protocols

D. Insurance information

E. Books

F. Oncologists

G. Treatment centers

H. Available trials

2. Reassurance that your feelings are normal.

3. Encouragement that others have survived cancer with prognoses as grim as your own.

4. Hope

5. Prayer support

6. Fellowship

7. Laughter

A good support group provides answers to the questions that most of us ask when confronting serious illness: How can I survive this? What happens if I don’t?

Most importantly, we come away from meetings knowing our concerns will be lifted up to the Ultimate Physician who can actually empower us for the battle we face. “For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there I am in the midst of them” (Matthew 18: 20).